Wednesday, August 8, 2012

The Daycare Debacle

I wish I could say I've been on maternity leave this last week, but that isn't the case at all.  In fact, I went to work full-time all of Wednesday, Thursday and Friday of last week.  To be completely honest, I was less than thrilled to be there.  It was a great conference, but I had to bring Gloria with me on Wednesday and let me tell you, conferences are QUIET and I felt horrible any time that she made the slightest peep.  She is SUCH a good baby, but babies do make noise and they do require time.  On Thursday and Friday, I had Evan's Mom here to watch Gloria and it was really hard leaving her.  It was the first time I had been without her and I just wanted to get home to hug on her more.

This week, I've worked a few hours everyday and brought her to work with me.  I'm just trying to get things ready for school starting and trying to make sure everything is in order for the first couple of weeks (until I return and have her in daycare).

Going back to work made me realize that I really had to get this daycare situation in order.  I've had a hell of a time finding decent daycare in this city.  From what I figure, Little Rock has two GREAT daycares for infants and the wait list on them is insane.  I put Gloria on the list when I was 11 weeks pregnant and was no where near the top.  Had I know, I would have put her on the list when we were TTC!  Sounds ridiculous, but that's the way it is.  In another life, I'm going to open a QUALITY amazing daycare.  It isn't even the price ... I just want a place that is worthy of my children.  Believe it or not, I don't mean a palace.  I mean a safe, nurturing, and educational environment.

We ADORE ADORE ADORE (yes all 3 in caps is necessary) where Liliana is now, but that took time to find (if you recall, we had a horrible experience at the first daycare we had her at here).  Unfortunately, her current school starts at 18 months.  It's a Montessori school and we have had ZERO complaints with them since she started there 9 months ago.

Last week I went to the daycare where I planned on putting Gloria.  When they took me to the room I saw a baby with poop ON HIS FACE.  ALL over his face. When I mentioned this to them they said "don't worry, we change every hour and he'll be changed in thirty minutes."  Yes they were going to leave that baby in his crib with SHIT on his face for 30 minutes.  I showed them the check in my hand, and swiftly walked out.  I made a statement.  I don't care if I seemed overbearing, but I refuse to let my child be at a place like that.

I had attitude ... big time attitude in front of them.  But the second I got to the car, the water works started.  Being a working mother is stressful sometimes (ok all the time) but the last thing I want is to feel guilty for working.  And leaving here there was NOT AN OPTION.  I would have rather stayed home.

When I was at the conference the head of our upper school heard my story and the next day she told me "I made some calls.  I got her a spot at a great place."

No it isn't one of the two "go to" places, but I toured it and it's pretty great.  I thought about taking Liliana out of her current place to not have 2 drop offs in the mornings, but I couldn't do that to my Liliana.  She's just too happy there.

So for now, I'll have a pretty long commute to do this, but it looks like Gloria will move in January to a place one block away from Liliana's.

Ultimately, we've got something settled for now.  And I won't feel guilty.  I'll have to leave earlier than I'd like, but we make sacrifices as parents and I am glad things are resolved for now.

BUT ... I still have 24 days of leave left (well, semi leave ... as you can see, I've still been working) and I plan to cherish time with my two gals as much as possible.


  1. I have to say as a woman who works in day cares and has even worked in an infant room in the past. I AM SHOCKED! If I had seen that, I would have been home, looking for licensing numbers for that day care and making some phone calls. They should be changed as needed as well as a check every so often.
    So many things wrong with that.

    I hope everything works out for you and you get both of your girls in great places.

  2. Sooo happy you found something for Gloria! That is a huge relief, I am very picky on day cares myself as my mom has worked in one her entire life I know what quality looks like. And like you there is a little person in the back of my head that wants to open a real quality day care where crap like that doesn't happen. I just feel bad for those parents who don't realize what goes on at some of these places. We had to take Aiden out of his first one after a week or so because he was miserable and after spending some uninvited time there to help him I realized I would cry too if I was there all day so we didn't return. Enjoy your time with the girls!

  3. I'm going through the same thing you are... I toured a place where a little girl almost got her fingers slammed in the door (behind me mind you) that the teacher AND the tour guide (manager) weren't watching! And the baby room and "nicely" positioned right next to the 3-4 year olds room where they were potty training and flushing toilets every 2 seconds. The tour guide then showed us the "back yard" where the kids were supposed to be swimming in the dirtiest "pool" where rainwater from the roof was falling... I think the eyes were the size of saucers and didn't even say good-bye.

    I'm so glad you found her a place though. We are still looking. :(

  4. Long-time reader, first time commenting here: I pulled my 9 and 7 year olds out of their facility because they were made to RUN LAPS outside last week when it was 97 degrees out and the humidity was so bad that you could hardly breathe out there. Oh, and my 7 year old daughter is overweight. They were made to do this because "all of the kids" were being "too active" and "loud." My kids adamantly denied behaving so and the director and both of their "teachers" (they are NOT teachers, in fact, it appears they are severely un-educated) admitted that neither one of them was involved in the bad behavior. Not that that is the point, but it just adds to the insantity. I wish someone like you (and others!) would open a quality child care place. Not that would help me in Wisconsin, but it would some other parents. ;-) Hang in there.

  5. OMG! 30 Minutes! I would have walked out too-That is disgraceful!! Good for you for what you did and I agree with the other lady that this should be reported. I am very happy for you that Gloria is in a good place and you will feel better for that. I am still wondering why you had to return to work so quickly when I realized that you only have 6 weeks! I think the states needs to have those laws changed and be more like here where we can be off for up to a year. The first year is so precious between mother and child. Now that i said that, please don;t feel bad...Please! You are a great mom who has to return to work and found a great place for your Gloris and Liliana seems to be doing well too-Bonus all around

  6. Love your blog, I'm following now :)

  7. I put our names on the infant daycare where my husband works when I first found out I was April 2006. We lost the baby. We kept our names on the list. My daughter was born about a year later -- and she only got into the daycare when she was 8 months old.

    It's insane. But finding the right fit is fantastic when it happens. Good luck!

  8. Affection is responsible for nine-tenths of whatever solid and durable happiness there is in our lives.