The fact of the matter is that although love is a GLORIOUS thing sometimes, sometimes it HURTS. When things in love are going well, you're on cloud nine. Isn't it the most amazing feeling to be wrapped up in the arms of someone you adore? You feel so safe, so secure, and so overwhelmingly fortunate. I love feeling this. And I love that the VAST majority of the time, when Evan is home, this is EXACTLY how I feel. I do feel that I am the luckiest girl in the planet to have the husband I have. He worked his ASS OFF this weekend, barely slept, had to go to the hospital multiple times for hours in the middle of the night, and somehow still came home wanting to hug me, kiss me, and tell me I was beautiful. He took a much needed nap yesterday for an hour in the afternoon, and I just sat there looking at him. Ten years later, I still love doing that. Admiring him for the Doctor he is, for the husband he is, and for the Daddy he is. A strong, wonderful individual.
While that part of love is so amazing, there is another part of love that can hurt. It can sting, can make you cry harder than you've ever imagined, and feel emotions just as strong as the happy ones. Though, overall, I have been blessed with a beautiful relationship with Evan, I will be the first to admit that we have experienced good times and bad times. While the good times are GOOD and I think the love envies that of Romeo and Juliet, the bad times SUCK. In comparison to what other couples go through, the bad times are SO very minimal and we usually are over it within a couple days. We rarely argue, and when we do, we usually come to a resolution quickly. It actually involves the two of us compromising 99% of the time admitting: "I need to give you a break" while the other says "I could have been trying a little harder." I think the other secret is ADMITTING your wrong doing. Though I am a very stubborn person and it usually takes me a couple days to get there, I have told Evan on NUMEROUS occasions "I overreacted, I'm sorry." But those couple days where I'm angry at him (I would say or vice versa but the guy never gets angry with me ... patient human being ... I am VERY irritating, I promise), I'm not myself. I feel like a miserable, unlike myself, human being.
And then there is this other part of love: the love for your children (or children close to you). And when I'm having a bad day at work, or just being stressed with life, Liliana has consistently put SO many smiles on my face. And this person very close to me must feel the same because while I was on the phone with her this Friday evening, through her muffled tears she told me "send me pictures of Liliana. Send me lots of pictures and make me smile because seeing her ALWAYS makes me smile and I need to laugh and smile." This morning, we were already running a little late to work but then I realized she looked too darn cute in her dress to not take advantage of the outfit.
Yeah, I get it: THIS kind of picture can make me smile just about any time I need a smile.
Though I may not see him as often as I'd like, I am so lucky and blessed to love my husband and daughter as much as I do. I feel surrounded by love when we're at home together and it is a beautiful beautiful thing.